hong kong ...

... is in the swing of blazing summer heat. I haven't been back for just under three years, and everything seems so different; the sight, the smell, the taste and the people ... everyone is mega efficient (to put it mildly!), and it does make one feel constantly tired, with so many stimulants for your senses.

results ...

... came out today and finally, I am not a medical student anymore. I have somehow managed to pass through the hundle, and am now a doctor. It has been a very long dream (albeit a good one!) and it is mind-blowing when it becomes true.

We also had our medic ball in the evening, and it was amazing but sad. Our last ever student ball (with full on cheese!), last ever being responsibiltiy-free, last ever having days on ends with the sole aim of revising. Seeing all those faces, knowing some whom you may never see again ...

But saying "goodbye" is indeed part of life, and without it, it is hard for "hello" to come by ...

finally ...

... I can think about packing, going away, leaving all of my worries and stresses behind.

I didn't realise how stressed I have been in the past few months, until this morning when I was leaving my flat, and couldn't find my wallet. As I had no cash or ID, I couldn't reach Paddington to sit my last exam. Suddenly, the world literally felt crumpling down, with thoughts of spending another 3 months in the library, reading through endless notes, cramming my head with random facts, thinking about medicine, medicine, medicine ...

Ended up frantically opening every cupboard, box, bag in my flat, and all these times, it has been sleeping peacefully in my cello music drawer. Life is indeed full of surprises, and I reached my last exam on time ...

Results are out on 20th June ... but meanwhile, life begins ...

private vs public worlds ...

... is an interesting concept, but it is definitely true. It is sad in a way, since our culture drives us to attain perfection. We have to be happy, successful, famous, with "sorted" life, or at least, desiring such a life. Or we go to the other extreme, becoming those who do not care, only-live-for-the-moment, trying to be free from the mundate world ...

Again, I am generalising, but hey, maybe for today, when we ask someone "how are you?", we will stop what we are doing, pause, look at them and genuinely listen. Even if they say "I am okay", listen to their tones, the underlying smiles, and maybe, when we are asked in return, we will also examine our own hearts and give a honest answer.

Okay dokey, got surgurical exam tomorrow. Should get back to work, but hey, last exam for this year!

toy story ...

... is such an amazing film. I watched it today, in the blazing heat, instead of the England vs Paraguay game (sorry, but football is really not my cup of tea ... hmm, maybe it is too hot for that today anyway!)

If you are in London and have a spare hour, do go and see the Pixar exhibition at the Sciene Museum. Make sure you look for the 21st century zoetrope, as we nearly missed it (to be honest, it is massive, most people won't miss it!) It is a spinning thing, with all of your favourite Toy Story characters ... and they literally spring into action!

The show was originally showed at MOMA, and as usual, only a quarter of the contents came over the atlantic. Never mind, maybe they picked the highlights :)

Can't wait when "Cars" comes out in the summer ... back to lovely revision!

To be surrounded by beauty ...

... everyday must be amazing. I know someone who works at Christie, and I can only imagine how it feels when you wake up in the morning, after the crazy tube journeys, to be greeted by a painting :) Or being a gardener, working in the fields all day, immenses oneself in the sunshines, rains, and your beloved blossoms ...

Medicine is probably on the opposite side of the scale, as there is tremendous amount of suffering to be witnessed first hand. After all, we are fighting a losing battle, as everyone dies eventually. Yet, the human spirit itself is a beauty; its perseverance in the face of difficulties, trust in the unknown, forgiving the past, hope in the future, all blend into one. Even the tears, the aguish, the fear is something to celebrate, as we journey into the future unknown, hand-in-hand ...

Sometimes ...

... I wish I have the courage to venture into the unknown, to face being vulnerable, to take the first step, to hold a possibility in my hands and believe its potential ...

Why is it so hard? "No" will not be the end of the world, but "never-to-know" is more frustrating, as if letting a butterfly flies by, without admiring its colour ...

Children's talk ...

... I heard the following conversation on the bus on the morning of my first exams for final:

Child A: (pointing to his head) Do you know you have a brain in there?
Child B: Really? I don't believe you.
Child A: Really. You will have a brain, as long as you believe there is a brain in there.

So true. A lot of times, to have faith is just to take that small step (to believe in the unknown), and you are there ...

Life is so simple from a child's point of view sometimes. We, adults, do complicate things (for better or worse).